When Rest Feels Unproductive

Does slowing down cause a sense of unease? Picture yourself after a long day, you sit down on your couch to rest but rather than finding that rest, your mind starts to focus on all of the things you “should” be doing. For many, that time of rest ends up being activating in some way. If we zoom out from our own experiences, we see a society that thrives off of a working culture that is not quick to honor rest and relaxation. This culture can lead to burnout, stress, and guilt when finding rest.

Based on a psychological perspective we can begin to grasp why rest may feel unproductive by better understanding the nervous system and learned responses over time. The nervous system is vital to our functioning and it keeps track of what is going on in our body and mind by creating new pathways, working on complicated memory processes, regulating our bodies, and so much more. If there is an imbalance in our nervous system try to remember that it will not get solved in a day. Furthermore, those negative feelings of guilt, shame, and stress are likely a learned response by your nervous system in attempts to keep you “safe.”

With this in mind, when our bodies and minds are burnt out or stressed out they may be in a state of fight or flight causing us to feel activated and rest to feel unsafe. If you are busy all the time, that is what your nervous system gets used to, and therefore finds difficulty in regulating that “always on” mindset. This is a much larger conversation, but know that there is hope in finding regulation and working on gaining peace in rest rather than activation. 

Practical Takeaways

• Rest needs to feel safe first and foremost. Notice what is feeling unsafe when you are looking to find rest and become your own scientist. This can look like racing thoughts, shallow breathing, difficulty sleeping, always thinking about what is coming next in your day or week. 
• Work with your nervous system through taking slow deep belly breaths with longer exhales than inhales. 
• Try experimenting with micro rest. This can look like 30 seconds to 5 minutes of giving your system a break. Practicing releasing the tension in your body can be effective for these breaks like releasing your jaw, removing focus from a screen, etc.

Reflection Question
What signals do you notice coming from your body that tell you it is time to slow down, even if your mind doesn’t want you to?

Disclaimer:
This blog is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for therapy or mental health treatment. If you are experiencing distress or need support, please reach out to your therapist or a qualified mental health professional.